In the summer of 1972 a large group from my all boys
school went on an 'educational' trip to France during the summer holidays. I
was not expecting a very exciting time, as my family spent much of the summer
in the South of France anyway, so the prospect of a few days inParis followed
by some time in Pourville, on the comparatively chilly Channel coast, did not
hold much promise. Although I had not been to Paris before, so was looking
forward to seeing the Eiffel Tower, at least. But the visit proved to be very
educational indeed.
The trip got off to a tedious start when we arrived
at our brutalist, concrete international schools hostel on the outskirts of
Paris. Well, perhaps not really the outskirts but it was near Paris Zoo in
Vincennes, so it was not exactly central. We arrived in the afternoon and, for
some reason four of us had to share our eight bed dormitory with children from
another school. Trying to get a clue as to the nationality of our international
roommates, we looked under the beds to locate something like a suitcase with a
luggage label but found instead three pairs of the biggest boots we had ever
seen. We realised that these probably didn't belong to twelve year olds and our
worst fears were confirmed when we discovered from the luggage that the owners
of the boots were from Germany. Don't forget that World War 2 had
finished less than thirty years previously. My father had fought against the
Afrika Korps in North Africa. The Germans were the enemy! We went down to dinner full of trepidation and
matters were made worse when we were served horse steak for dinner in the vast
canteen (actually it was alright, if a bit chewy).
After dinner we returned to
our dormitory but, fortunately, there was no sign of the enormous Germans and
we got into bed as quickly as possible. The Germans had taken the beds nearest to
the window so we were in the four beds closest to the door. Having had a long
day, travelling by coach and ferry, with an early start, we fell asleep
quickly. However, we were woken some time afterwards by the sound of a group of
people coming through the door into the room. It was...the Germans, who proved
to be as enormous as we had feared. However, pushing in behind them were three
or four very well developed German girls. All were wearing chiffon babydoll
nighties with knickers but, very obviously, in at least one case, nothing
underneath the top. My friend Dobs and I, who had the beds closest to the door
and were the only ones to wake up, were somewhat more mature than the other two
from my school at this stage. In fact we were both about 5' 10" tall., We
were exceedingly diverted by these gorgeously leggy (one of the side effects of
a babydoll is that anyone wearing one looks leggy) young women who were, probably,
about seventeen. The German girls thought we were "dear little English
boys". Dobs and I thought they were the ultimate personification of female
sexuality.. The fact that they then sat on our beds almost drove us insane. One
of these girls actually patted Triple P on the head and everything under the
top half of her nightie jiggled enticingly. They whispered to their friends in
German, still with the lights off and then as suddenly as they had appeared
they all left again, giant German boys included. I looked at Dobs in the bed
opposite.
"Fucking HELL!" he hissed. They really
were that impressive.
Of course none of our fellows believed us the next
day especially, when our other school roommates had no recollection of any
female interlopers. Interestingly, the
German boys were not in their beds that morning and they must have left that
day as we never saw them again.
However, this first proper encounter with the
opposite sex had emboldened both Dobs and I.
We felt that we had seen a glimpse of a secret world which our childish
classmates had yet to appreciate.
"We need to meet more girls on this trip!"
said Dobs.
The rest of the time in Paris had been very boring.
We spent a whole day at the zoo, which was completely tedious and not as
good as London Zoo. It was full of mangy, bored looking animals (I particularly
remember some tragic penguins on an ugly concrete 'mountain' in the centre of the
zoo) and it was completely lacking in visiting parties of French schoolgirls
(as Dobs and I had hoped for), given it was the summer holidays. I remember writing a postcard to my family
(who were down on the Mediterranean) saying that I had been in Paris three days
and I hadn't even caught a glimpse of the Eiffel tower, even from a
distance. The German girls were the only bright spark during the stay. Even
more annoying was the fact that the teachers all went out to trendy little
brasseries for dinner every night and we were stuck with the hostel canteen food
which was mostly overcooked, tough meat and those slimy green beans the French
seem to love. I have always thought that ordinary French cuisine is overrated
and you are much more likely to get a good meal in an average restaurant in
Italy than in France, Given my father's interest in cooking and the fact that
we ate out in restaurants all over France during our annual holidays I had a
rather precocious interest in proper cooking and was not impressed by what we were
offered.
We were then supposed to move to a town called
Pourville, on the coast, for the second half of the trip. However, at the last
minute this was changed to Dieppe, because of bad reports of the hostel from
another group. So we were sent, instead, to centre d'hébergement les roches,
Dieppe, which is still a hostel for school groups today. Given we were a
last minute booking we were crammed in again and Dobs, I and two other
classmates, Lugs and Mutt, were put into a small annex next to the main hostel.
This was a much nicer environment than the hostel in Paris, featuring a large
nineteenth century house in extensive wooded grounds. We were in a small
cottage by the gate with one of the school's French teachers and his wife in a
small room and us in the four bed main room.
We had a free afternoon and Lugs and Mutt joined
most of the rest of the school in the canteen where a TV was set up so everyone
could watch the swimming heats at the Munich Olympics. Seeing our teachers were
out of the way, Dobs and I left the annex and instead of turning left to the
main house we turned right and stepped onto Avenue Gambetta and headed downhill
towards the town. We soon found a local magasin and Dobs bought food
(crisps, or 'cheeps' as the French called them) as we didn't think we were
being fed nearly enough food. Also by the door were large glass bottles of
local cider. Dobs stuck two on the counter and the French shopkeeper was very
happy to take our money without asking awkward questions about our age. As we
left the shop to make the long, hot walk up the hill we fell in with two pretty
girls who had also been inside it. It turned out that they were staying at the
same hostel. I remember an anxious discussion between the teachers when they
realised that all the other pupils staying at the centre were French
schoolgirls.
The girls were older than us, fourteen as against
our twelve, but we didn't admit to our age as we were both much taller than
them. Fortunately, Dob's French was very good (he had a French mother) so
communication was not a problem. By the time we reached the hostel again we were
all quite hot given the mid afternoon sun.
"Perhaps they would like some cider?" I suggested
to Dobs, the very first time I had offered alcohol to a girl. The two young ladies were in to our quiet
annexe like a shot. The prototypically French shutters were closed, so it was
dim and inviting in the room after the bright sun and heat outside. There were
no chairs so we had to sit on the beds. I sat on my bed. Dobs sat on his bed
and after a quick glance between the two of them the French girls sat one with
each of us. I can't remember the name of Dobs' girl but she had blonde pigtails
and I thought that she looked more like one of the German girls we had seen in
Paris. My girl, however, was called Françoise and had long black hair , dark
eyes and looked very French indeed. We opened the chips and Dobs opened the
cider, as I had no idea how to open one of those complicated wired on corks but
Dobs was much more mechanically minded than I was. We had no glasses and I went
to look in the bathroom for a tooth glass but there wasn't one. When I stepped
back into the dormitory, Françoise was happily swigging cider from the bottle,
however. The bags of crisp were passed around as was the cider. The girls took
it upon themselves to hand feed us crisps which they seemed to find vary
amusing.
You would have thought that I would have remembered
exactly how I ended up kissing Françoise, given she was the first girl I had
kissed, but it was nearly forty five years ago. I do think it was me that
initiated it and I think I expected her to immediately rebuff me. I didn'texpect
her to start snogging me with her salty, appley lips. I became aware that Dobs
and his girl were looking at us but my universe had shrunk to an area about
three feet across. As Dobs later told me: ‘I didn't expect it to be you who
made the first move.’ I didn't expect it either. I also didn't expect Francoise
to kneel astride my thighs, to get a better angle of attack, as I sat on the
bed. I do remember her unbuttoning her plain white blouse (neither were exactly
provocatively dressed) to reveal a pretty bra (it had lace on it for
heaven's sake) and then pressing her barely concealed bust against my shirt as
she dived in for more kissing.
I had no idea how to kiss a girl, of course. I knew
that adults kissed each other on the lips but I was a bit shocked when her
tongue started to probe my mouth. It was literally, as I later found out,
French kissing. I did have some recollection from reading an Ian Fleming James
Bond book (I think) that you were supposed to caress their heads so I started
to stroke Francoise's hair, then her neck, which she seemed to really enjoy. I
was also very conscious of her smell which was, basically, hot skin but there
was some other musky scent evident, although it was some time and several
magazines I should not have been reading at my age, before I realised what was
causing this. I do remember being almost painfully erect in my jeans. Françoise
wriggled closer and shrugged off her blouse. My hands were now able to access
what seemed like acres of warm skin and I stroked her like a cat. Although I
had no idea how to stroke a cat as we didn't have pets. I do remember tracing
the bumps in her backbone up to her neck and down. My hand slid around her side
and, almost as if it was undirected (which of course it wasn't), I closed it
over her satin and lace clad breast. I could actually feel her hard nipple on
my palm. I seriously thought that I might actually come in my jeans at this
point.
Unfortunately, just as she started to undo the
buttons on my shirt, the wife of the French teacher, who were staying in the
other room in the annexe, burst in. Dobs was lying full length on his bed with
the blonde next to him, snogging away. Both of their tops were unbuttoned. I
had Françoise astride my thighs, undoing my shirt, her blouse already discarded
next to me. Everyone froze and I was expecting an explosion from Madame.
Fortunately, she was French herself and seemed generally amused by the whole situation.
She politely told the girls to get dressed and disappear, which they did with a
cheery wave. She poured the rest of the cider (not that there was much left)
down the bathroom washbasin but never said anything to the French teacher. The
possession of alcohol issue would have been a lot more serious than the being
found with girls issue, as I later found out. In fact she was obviously trying
not to laugh throughout the whole process.
While there was no comeback from any of our
teachers, the French teacher's wife must have said something to the teachers at
the girl's school as when Dobs and I tried to sit with Françoise and her blonde
friend at dinner, we were shooed off by their teachers. We were then laughed at
by our schoolmates for wanting to sit with girls. Dobs and I didn't
care. We had made a great discovery. Girls liked us. We liked them. And much
enjoyment could be had between the two.
Dobs became the first boy in our year to have a
proper girlfriend, from the girl's school next door, at the age of fifteen. He
was laughed at and teased and he didn't care. He became a City lawyer and I see
him for dinner once in a while, along with Mutt who had been in the annexe with
us but watching Mark Spitz rather than feeding cider to girls. It was him who
told me last year that he had discovered that the wife of the French teacher
wasn't his wife at all but his mistress, who he had brought on the school
trip, illicitly. No wonder she was so understanding!
Next time we move on to 1975 and more kissing
lessons...
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